The other day, I was walking out of a neighborhood casual-dining restaurant, and I noticed that an entire booth of fellow diners was looking at me.


Well, they weren’t exactly looking at me. They were looking at my shoes.


Now, some of you might find it flattering to have a booth of people keenly interested in, and talking about, your footwear. For me, being not much of a fashion plate, I found it unnerving, so unnerving, in fact, that I immediately reported it to my wife once we reached the safety and relative anonymity of our car.


“They were looking at my shoes!” I told her.


She didn’t seem to grasp the gravity of the situation, based on her rather dismissive comment: “So?”


“But, do my shoes look stupid?” I asked.


“No,” she said, adding: “I think they’re actually kind of cool-looking.”




Do you know where your kids are right now?


I bet I know where mine are: They’re either playing non-educational video games, watching the Rugrats on television, or both at the same time.


So the question of the day is: Since I know where they are, does that make me a good parent? Or since I know what they’re doing, does that make me a bad parent?


I won’t be the only one worrying, or not worrying, about my kids beginning this month: School opens again, and a whole new set of handlers will be helping me keep them busy.


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